Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
9:00 am
Sat December 17, 2011

Lightning Fill In The Blank

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now on to our final game, Lightning Fill in the Blank. Each of our players will have sixty seconds in which to answer as many fill in the blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer now worth two points. Carl, can you give us the scores?

CARL KASELL, HOST:

Maz Jobrani has the lead, Peter. He has three points. Paula Poundstone and Jessi Klein are tied for second. They both have two points.

SAGAL: Okay. Well, we have flipped a coin to break the tie. Paula has elected to go second. Jessi, you're up first.

JESSI KLEIN: Uh-oh.

SAGAL: Please fill in the blank.

KLEIN: Okay.

SAGAL: In a ceremony on Thursday, Defense Secretary Leon Panetta officially declared the end of the blank.

KLEIN: Iraq war.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Seven GOP presidential candidates met in Sioux City on Thursday for their last blank before the Iowa caucuses.

KLEIN: Debate.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Newt Gingrich stirred up controversy last weekend when he called blanks an invented people.

KLEIN: Palestinians.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: For this year's Most Fascinating person of the year special, Barbara Walters picked Apple cofounder blank.

KLEIN: Oh, Steve Wozniak. Apple co-founder?

SAGAL: Yes. No, Steve Jobs. There were only two and you got the other one.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

KLEIN: But he's dead. Doesn't she have to interview them?

SAGAL: Apparently not this time.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Here we go.

PAULA POUNDSTONE: I would never have gotten that.

SAGAL: For the second time in three weeks, a dog made news for blanking.

KLEIN: Dying.

SAGAL: Shooting his owner.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: According to a new study from the Pew Research center, a record 49 percent of adults in the US are blank.

KLEIN: Not married.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A French film about the silent movie era received the most nominations for this year's blank awards.

KLEIN: Golden Globe.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A man in Brookville, Pennsylvania was caught when he tried to get time off work by blanking.

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

KLEIN: Tweeting that he just had sex.

SAGAL: No.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Can't come into work. No, by placing a fake obituary for his mother in the local newspaper. Having the newspaper obit on hand to back him up made Scott Bennett's dead mother story sound more credible when he offered it to his boss, until his mom ruined everything by being still alive.

KLEIN: I'm not meeting that guy at Chili's.

SAGAL: No.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: He now has all the time off he wants since he was fired and will be spending it in his room without his supper.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

KLEIN: I'm very embarrassed about the Steve Jobs' question.

SAGAL: I think that would - nobody would have remembered if you'd gotten that right. But now it will be an immortal moment.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Carl, how did Jessi do on our quiz?

KASELL: Jessi had five correct answers, for ten more points. She now has twelve points and Jessi Klein has taken the lead.

SAGAL: Well done, all right.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: So, Paula, you're up next.

POUNDSTONE: Let me just say Steve Jobs.

SAGAL: Good job.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Fill in the blank. On Tuesday, the Iranian government refused an official US request to return the blank that Iran captured last week.

POUNDSTONE: The drone that was spying on them.

SAGAL: That's right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Steve Jobs, Rebecca Black and the iPhone 5 were among the top searches on blank this year.

POUNDSTONE: Google.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: The company Zynga, known for its Facebook game blank, harvested $1 billion dollars when it went public this week.

POUNDSTONE: The farm thing, the farm thing.

SAGAL: The farm thing.

POUNDSTONE: Yeah.

SAGAL: Farmville, all right, I'll give it to you, Farmville.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

POUNDSTONE: Not so much. Was it Farmville?

SAGAL: It was Farmville. This week the Latvian airline Air Baltic announced plans to branch out and blank during flights.

POUNDSTONE: To branch out and fly during flights.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: No, to sell cars to passengers.

POUNDSTONE: Oh yes.

SAGAL: On Monday, former first daughter blank made her first appearance as a special correspondent on NBC.

POUNDSTONE: Chelsea Clinton.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Thursday, a French court found former president blank guilty of embezzlement.

POUNDSTONE: Sarkozy.

SAGAL: No, Jacques Chirac. He's the current president, Sarkozy. Hailed as the new must-have automotive accessory, you can now purchase a blank for your car.

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

POUNDSTONE: A must-have automotive accessory, a invisible shield.

SAGAL: No, a thong.

POUNDSTONE: A thong, yeah.

SAGAL: A car thong.

POUNDSTONE: Yeah.

SAGAL: If you're one of those people who liked to deck your car out in a car bra back in the 80s, at long last you can complete your car's ensemble of lingerie.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Car thongs are exactly what they sound like - gigantic pink frilly underpants with a thong back that you can slip on the back of your car.

POUNDSTONE: Nice.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Be careful though, because there's nothing worse than getting halfway across town and realizing you've got a trunk wedgie.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Carl, how did Paula do on our quiz?

POUNDSTONE: Pretty good.

KASELL: Paula had...

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

KASELL: Paula had four correct answers, for eight more points. She now has ten points, but Jessi Klein remains the leader with twelve points.

SAGAL: All right.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

KLEIN: Steve Jobs.

SAGAL: So...

KLEIN: Got to love Steve Jobs.

SAGAL: All right, so how many then does Maz need to win?

KASELL: Five correct answers.

SAGAL: All right, here we go Maz. This is for the game. You can do it. President Obama warned Congress on Thursday not to leave town without extending blank tax cuts.

MAZ JOBRANI: The payroll tax.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After a negative campaign by a Florida evangelical group, Lowes and Kayak.com dropped out as advertisers on a reality show about blanks.

JOBRANI: All American Muslims.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After spending 20 years in French and American jails, this week former military dictator blank was extradited back to Panama.

JOBRANI: Noriega.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: In one of their biggest changes yet, on Thursday the timeline feature was rolled out on the social networking site blank.

JOBRANI: Facebook.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A Spanish newspaper will begin producing a version of the Huffington Post called blank.

JOBRANI: El Posto de Huffington.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: So close.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: I almost want to give it to you. It will actually be called El Huffington Post.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Still angry with Alec Baldwin, the Association of Professional Flight Attendants has requested his show blank be removed from American Airlines flights.

JOBRANI: 30 Rock.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: In a two day record breaking auction at Christies, the jewelry belonging to actress blank brought in more than 137 million dollars.

JOBRANI: Liz Taylor.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: TV crews filming a recent "Law and Order: SVU" episode based on the Occupy Wall Street protesters were interrupted by blank.

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

JOBRANI: The Occupy Wall Street protestors.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

POUNDSTONE: Yeah, baby.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: So the producers of the show built an Occupy New York set to do an Occupy New York themed episode and the Occupy New York protestors came and occupied the Occupy New York set.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: They said it was disrespectful of their movement. Other protestors simply were demanding more screen time for Richard Belzer.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Carl, did Maz do well enough to win?

KASELL: He needed five correct answers. Maz had seven correct answers.

(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE)

KASELL: So with seventeen points, Maz Jobrani is this week's champion.

POUNDSTONE: Congratulations.

JOBRANI: Thank you.

KLEIN: Nice work.

JOBRANI: I'm excited.

SAGAL: You should be.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright National Public Radio.

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